Friday, February 22, 2008

Another sign

My kids, early in the morning,
eyes blinking back the strong sun
shining through still frosty windshields,
singing country songs
and talking about Zach's surfer hair days.

In his defense, the chicks really did dig it!

He got his hair cut for baseball yesterday. I'll post a picture when he gets home.
Kenny got his hair cut today. Kate got hers cut. I'm the only shaggy one. Only not too shaggy, cause Kate cut my hair a few weeks ago. Lost about 4 or 5 inches. You see, it took a little while to get rid of the "crookedness." Oh well. It's only hair. It will grow back.

Thursday, February 21, 2008


Sorry, folks, going to add one of those security thingies like Patti said. It means that you'll have to type in the letters. I hope that won't be too much of a pain. I love reading the comments and I hate to make it more inconvenient. GRRR.

Friday, February 15, 2008

More Signs of Spring

Hearts all a flutter,
people getting twitterpated,
like Zach and Kate
buying Valentine's presents.

And this flower that came to me at work, with a card: "Dave is thinking of you today. A Friend."

Wow. Thank you, friend, whoever you are. Thank you.

and this...

and this....

Flying baseballs, flying frisbees.
Spring is here.

Saturday, February 09, 2008


What do I love about Walla Walla?
Besides everything?
I love that the seasons change in one day.
Today spring came.
The sun peeked out.
Green shoots poked their way through black soil.
When I opened the car door, the inside was warm from the sun.
I have callouses on my hands from raking willow branches.
I moved my Haroldson-andirondack chair from the garage to the yard.
The air is fresh and clean.
Neighbors are smiling as they clean away winter debris.
Sweeping away cobwebs,
sparkling windows let in new light.
Our kitten, outside for the first time,
climbed trees,
tight-rope-walked the fenceline,
and stretched out in a small pool of sunshine on the deck.
It's good. It really is.


TA DA! New smile on the way. Kenny did really well and after being a bit achey for a few days, is back to himself. March 10 the lowers go on. Even two years ago, I'd never have believed this possible. He's amazing.

And I'm in a huge fight with the State of WA over his disability benefits. Dummy me decided to do what seemed wise and SAVE some of the money he gets from Social Security after Dave's death. Well, now that he has over $2000, they want to deny all his benefits. What a mess. Should have bought him a big screen tv or something, I guess. Steve Jordan (absolutely amazing person and stellar human being) is helping me get the money moved to a disabilities trust, so hopefully it will be taken care of. But what a headache. And really, how far do they think $2,000 would go anyway? Sigh.

Kate is feeling better. She's at the Y playing basketball with a friend right now. Tamiflu is amazing, amazing stuff! Zach's still battling the cough and recurring fever, but she's better other than being really tired.

Basketball is over for Zach. Last game last night. We travelled to Yakima. The sophomores won again, only losing 1 game this season. Varsity lost, but is still 2nd in league and is going to playoffs.

Another sure sign spring is here....a box from Eastbay with size 13 cleats and XL batting gloves...all Under Armour, of course!

Walks away humming,

Take me out to the ball game
Take me out with the crowd
Buy me some peanuts and cracker jack,
I don't care if I never get back.....

Sunday, February 03, 2008


Okay, so here's the story. Tuesday, Kate goes to basketball practice at 4:00 am (really 6:30, but this what's a story without a little exaggeration?) and then has AAU practice in the evening at something like 7:00 pm. She gets home a little tired, and feels warm. I think she's just doing too much. Zach's been coughing for days and not sleeping well and is all congested. The nine inches of snow we got is STILL hanging around. And I just went to Home Depot 3 times in one night to try to get a sump pump so my basement doesn't flood. So that's the scene.

First act, I get up on Tuesday, Zach sounds a little worse and Kate's got a bit of a fever. So I give them tylenol, give Zach instructions to give his sister fluids and more tylenol in 4-6 hours and to call me if there are any problems. I go to work. (Kenny meantime, healthy as a horse, as always.) So no call. No news is good news, right?


Second act, I pick up Kenny, get home at 3:30 and say, "Hey, Z, how are you?" He's lounging on the couch, coughing. "I did my math assignments."

Mom thinks, "WOW." Says, "Good for you, you must be proud of yourself. You sound like you're still coughing, though, how's Kate?"

"She hasn't woke up today."

Brain screeches to a halt. "Not at all?"


Okay, I'm thinking, "Did it not occur to you that not waking up might, just might, be a reason for concern? You are so fired as a nurse. Why did I not stay home?"

Third act: But I manage to not scream. And go upstairs, and wake Kate. She's got a temp of 104. She's delusional. "Mom you're shaking. So is the tv." "No honey, I think your eyes are shaky." "Hey, make everything stop moving so fast." She can't stand up and her eyes are rolling around in her head.

So we go to the doctor and sure enough. She tests positive for influenza. Not your garden-variety flu....the BIG flu. The one you get vaccinated for. Except we didn't. Long story there, but believe me when I say there is a reason. And a 10 year old girl from Walla Walla died of this last week.

Okay, color me freaked out.

But they put her on an antiviral regimen, and last night she was feeling well enough to throw a sock at her brother. She's still very tired, but her fever hasn't spiked in 24 hours, so I think the worst is over.

Zach missed three days of school and one basketball game. His team lost that game. There goes the undefeated season. DRAT. Z was able to play last night, although he's not 100%. They won that game.

Kenny gets braces on Tuesday. Wish me luck. He's already fretting about it. And following me around the house telling me that he's FINISHED with dentists and won't go. This ought to be truckloads of fun.

I met with an attorney last week. (A friend, Terri.) About guardianship for Kenny. It will be a simple thing. But I was surprised how much sadness I felt about the whole thing. It's one step I need to take to protect Kenny, but it means facing...and declaring...that he's not going to be able to manage these things himself. As we go on, day-to-day, Kenny does so well. It's easy to pretend sometimes, that he's just a regular teenager. In some ways he is. Most of the time I can just not look at the ways he's not. This brings it all right out there. Ready or not. He's going to turn 18.

And once again, I come face-to-face with all those dreams. You know what I mean, when your baby is born, you hold them in your arms and you imagine. You believe. The whole world is waiting for him. He can do ANYTHING. He is PERFECT. Except when it's not. I think we all have to face that the dream child we imagine is different from the real child we have. But there are some of you out there who understand what I'm saying. Who know that sharp razor, who've experienced the keenness of that loss. It changes your world profoundly. Forever.

I could write a lot more about that...but not in the space to do that right now. At least the animals are having a blast: