Thursday, February 11, 2016

Different Loves

I really believe that in this life,
there are many loves that will come your way.

Some are family.
A mom's touch, a dad's guidance, a sister's phone call.
A daughter's laugh, a son's tears.
These are all bits of love
rained into our lives.

Some are friends.
Those who listen, those who call bullshit,
those who sit with you when your heart is breaking wide open.
Those who stay, when everyone else leaves,
to help you pick up the pieces.
And make you laugh,
when you thought you never would again.
This is love, too.

It comes our way, every day,
in a million different ways,
different shapes and sizes.

Even romantic love.
There are loves that last a minute.
And loves that last a lifetime.

We must learn to welcome each love,
every love,
and accept it for what it is meant to be.

How can love last only a minute?
I'll tell you.

One day in Tacoma,
I took my Bobcat to the gas station.
I was about 20 years old.
I fitted the nozzle into the tank
and began fueling.

I looked up over the roof of my car.
And suddenly locked eyes
with the boy filling his pickup truck
across the way.

His eyes were bluest blue,
staring through a fringe of sandy hair
under a baseball cap.

And just like a song,
the world stood still.
I was aware of nothing but his eyes,
looking deep into me.

I caught my breath, but couldn't look away.
Time was meaningless.
I was lost in that moment,
lost in an ocean
lost in blue eyes.

And then a car drove between us
and the spell was broken.
I blinked.
With shaky hands,
I finished the task at hand,
got into my car,
and merged into traffic.

That was a two-minute love.
It was a moment I remember vividly
32 years later.
It was almost magical.
It brought me peace and joy.
It made me smile a secret smile.
It makes me feel happy,
even after all this time.

I accepted that this tiny love
came into my life
only for a fleeting moment,
but with a gift to give.

I could have tried to bend it
into something it wasn't.
I could have wondered
"Why didn't I give him my number?"
"What if that was my soulmate and I missed it?"
"Why didn't I..."
"I should have..."

And regret,
self-recrimination
would have bled all over
the perfect moment.
Tarnishing the memory.
Rusting the gift.

(chapter 2 coming soon)







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