Kenny is 17!

Okay, so much has happened in the last few weeks. So much I can't even get to a computer, let alone update.

First, Kenny turned 17 yesterday. SEVENTEEN! How did that happen? I am so proud of him. His vocabulary is amazing. "Staggering" to use a word he used the other day. He's doing well at school, he's happy and excited about everything.

Yesterday was tough for him, though. I think it's a double, because his birthday is during football season. And Dave should be here. He should. He'd be so proud of Kenny. I can't stand to think about it, because it brings up so sharply what we are missing. Dave's pride and his exuberance, his spirit and his strength.

Zach played in the varsity game last week and got his first varsity touchdown. I screamed and cheered...and cried, too. Dave would have been jumping out of his shoes. Sigh. You should have seen the look on Zach's face as he came out of the locker room and found me for a hug and kiss. I can't explain it. I can't even try. But it's a picture I'll carry in my heart forever.

Kate had her first volleyball game. She had a blast and her team won handily. She's not dancing this quarter, which absolutely floors me, but she seems okay with it. It was tough not to make her go, because I love so to watch her, but I guess it's not about me. She's learning the clarinet and after a few weeks of squeaking and squawking, now beautiful tones float down the hallway in the evening.

Our elegant cat, Two-Face died in Kate's closet. It was hard for all of us, especially Kenny. Two-Face was his kitty. He was the one that got all crooked and looked drunk after being gone for 4 days, but he had recovered beyond all their expectations...then suddenly he was sick again. It was awful. And I couldn't touch him. I had to make Zach do it. I was surprised by how freaked out I was. Began to wonder if I was becoming a wimpy-girly-girl. But then Koda brought in a dead pheasant and I was able to get it out of the house and into the garbage without any problem. Probably because Zach wasn't home.

Oh...and then...get this...Kate has an assignment to find 5 things in our garbage and write a paragraph about what it says about the family. Sheesh. Okay...her items: 1 torn up comforter, 1 bouquet of dead flowers, 1 dead pheasant, 1 plastic x-box game wrapper and I forgot the last one...oh, yeah! 1 empty can of spray paint, WaHi blue. She asked me if I wanted to read her paragraph. I said no, thanks.

Thanks, Mr. Language Arts Teacher. Speaking of teachers...how is it that I can e-mail a hello-let-me-introduce-myself-here's-how-to-contact-me-have-a-great-year letter to 18 teachers and get ONE response???? I'm just sayin.... By the way, thanks, Mr. Senter, you're a gem.

Homecoming is just around the corner. Both boys have dates. That ought to make for some great photo ops.

Koda is growing by the minute. Almost as big as Duke and she's really become part of the family. She's gotten to be a real sweetie. I wasn't sure when she first came...she was such a, well, a DOG. Duke is more like a furry little people.

And I almost forgot...September 20 was our anniversary. Number 21. The kids took me out to dinner at La Casita and they didn't make me wear the dumb sombrero like Dave would have. After the kids went to bed, I spent hours looking at old photographs of Dave, flipping through the albums, finding the ones that we haven't scanned into the computer, so they were new again since I hadn't seen them in a while. I watch my screen saver or visit the album on flickr to see his face all the time, so it was kind of a shock to see these pictures. They weren't the ones I'm used to seeing every day, and they took my breath away, made me shaky. I hadn't thought there would be any more surprises, since I've memorized every line of his face in every picture on the computer. I can't explain very well. I hid them from myself, so maybe it can happen again, even though it hurts.

Please, keep praying:

for my kids, (I'll have to tell you about the K&K breakthrough soon),
for me, (although Zach told me I never have to ever consider dating because he will come home from college every single weekend and keep me company so I guess I'll be well-taken-care-of!),
for our associate pastor, who's having serious heart trouble,
for Nana and Spud,
for my dear friend, S, whose husband is battling cancer and having a tough round of chemo,
for my other friend, who was diagnosed with cancer,
for yet another friend, who has a family member battling cancer that's spread,
for one more friend, whose husband died in an auto crash,
and anyone I forgot.

God remembers.

Love to you all,
pics and more stories soon, I hope.