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Tough Days

Saturday, August 20, 2005 2:25 AM CDT

I think this is the third entry today, so check the journal history for more info.

Tonight, we gave Dave a bath, and he woke up fully for the first time today. He was awake and talking a bit, and drank some water. He seemed to feel better after the bath, much more comfortable. He wasn't awake long, but was fully focused and communicating with us when he was. He went back to sleep, but the sleep was different than it had been all day. All day, he was very unresponsive, a few times leaning into my hand, but mostly not responding. He squeezed Cindy's hand once, and opened his eyes for Amy. But after the bath, and being awake, his sleep was different, seeming more like normal sleep. He was sleeping lightly, but still responding more, nodding his head, murmuring "mm-hmm." Yesterday his breathing was from his diaphragm, not wanting to choke on the mucus. The mucus is gone with the patch, and he's breathing easily and normally now. Yesterday and earlier today, he was not really moving much, but tonight, he has been moving more, reaching out, helping us with bedding changes and pillow adjustment, giving direction with his hand as to how he wants things. The pain in his neck has eased, and he's holding and moving his head normally now. We haven't had to give any nausea or pain medication. It's a small reprieve, but one we treasure.

Thanks, Deb, for the late night heart-to-heart, it's just what I needed. You always know. I love you.

Erik and Evy, you were (again) there for me during the tough parts of today. Reaching for you is as natural as breathing. I'm grateful beyond words for the lifeline that you are.

Thanks for the kind words of affirmation, Judy & Bob, it meant a lot.

And Mom and Dad, I could not do this without you.

Z comes home tomorrow. He's been having a blast in Idaho, and checking in on the phone every day. We miss him like crazy.

Jim, you made quite an impression on Kate, she wants to know when are you please coming back and will you bring your three girls? We so enjoyed seeing you with her, it gave us a glimpse of the kind of father you are, fun, loving, patient and delighting in the funny quirks.

Night, all.


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